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Her boyfriend, the one who put his sperm inside her, is not coming with. The other is a middle-aged man wearing a dirty baseball cap. I’m there to support her, but I’m anxious inside the reaches of my own mind.
I drive her to the Planned Parenthood and struggle to find the designated parking lot. We walk past protestors holding signs out front depicting a fetus with alien-like eyes. I wonder if they have jobs or if they’ve made this their full-time job. I am firmly pro-choice, but I don’t know what decision I would make if I were in her position.
I wonder what led them to believe so fervently in this cause. I think about it for a split second, but don’t allow myself to indulge in debating hard decisions that are not something I have to worry about right now. As one of my former boyfriends told me, “Your uterus is basically barren right now.”We check in at the front desk and I wonder how many other women in the waiting room are there for an abortion.
Many people who go to Planned Parenthood go for reasons other than abortion.
I give her a pastel colored gift bag that contains an adult coloring book among other self-care items.
I’m not sure what you give somebody who is about to have an abortion, but the fact that she enjoys art and may need an activity to focus on in the coming days, it seems at least acceptable.
At what point do we admit we are no longer living in a society that respects the rights of its people? We live in a society obsessed with power and with control. I am in shock that a white man in his 60’s could ever speak for my body.
As I try to digest the choices of a bunch of middle-aged white men who don’t have training in medicine, who have never occupied a female body, I wonder about legacy. I wonder what will happen to me in the coming years if I am faced with choices I don’t want to make.
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It’s a cloudy, cool day in late spring when I pick up my friend in a restaurant parking lot.